GLAD
Mental health feels a bit like an insurmountable topic. Who I am to try to cover a topic that hundreds if not thousands of professionals are still researching and struggling to explain? Good news, I’m not going to try to answer all the questions or maybe even any of the questions. In this space we try to bring about positive changes, in ourselves, our community and our world. Today I’m hoping to address one of the ways we can recognize positivity in our lives. This year and a half has been a particularly difficult year for me and I’m sure millions others. I will not try to say that my pain and suffering is any worse than anyone else’s. My struggles have no impact on the struggles or successes of others. However, during my journey to better handle the stresses life throws my way I was introduced a technique that helps you focus on the different positive things that are happening in your everyday life. It is called the GLAD technique.
What is the GLAD technique you ask? The GLAD technique is a list of specific items you should acknowledge every day. This can be a mental list, a journal entry or a conversation with a friend or family member. For me personally, I find the journaling more effective as it holds me accountable. If I don’t have anything to write down then I probably didn’t actually focus on these items throughout the day. GLAD stands for grateful, learned, achieved, and delight. Traditionally you will want to find at least one thing for each category every day. For me personally it was suggested I identify 3 things I am grateful for as I really struggle acknowledging the positive in my life. (I like to believe that it feels so much easier to identify the negative than the positive because I like to live in and experience the rather than stopping to acknowledge it. Whereas I don’t want to experience the negative so I try to identify it so that I can immediately resolve it. This works much better in theory than in reality.) Regardless, each day, you should acknowledge at least one thing in each category. What am I grateful for? What have I learned today? What have I achieved today? And what did I take delight in today. Now if you are anything like me this seems like a very intimidating task. Although if you are like other people you might recognize this for the relatively easy task that it is. The point of the exercise is to focus on the good things that happen on a daily basis but are often overlooked. These do not need to be profound. They can be as simple as I am grateful bread comes pre-sliced. I learned that some turtles breathe out of their butts. I achieved/accomplished brushing my teeth and I delighted in the minute of silence I experienced checking the mail.
So why does GLAD work? According to Donald Altman in his Psychology Today article, it forces us to become present and focus on the positive. In our ancestor’s time being able to predict the future was often a life or death ability. It would be better to assume a predator was hiding around the corner rather than dinner. While we would certainly hope that dinner was around the corner if we were wrong we might end up dead. So while it’s nice to hope for the best we often plan for the worst. As such this trait was passed on generation after generation. With that, however, when we allow our minds to wonder and think about the future we often steer towards negative or stressful thoughts. Altman explains that the best way to overwrite the negative thoughts is to be present, to think about what is really happening in life rather than what might happen. Using GLAD allows us to focus on reality. As with anything in life, the more we practice the better we get and the easier it becomes. If we practice positive thoughts everyday it will become easier and maybe even the norm to see the positive in situations rather than the negative.
This technique has brought a lot of learning to look at things from a different perspective for me. I have the tendency to overthink things. I can make the simplest things seem like the most complex things in the world. This tendency often leads to me having confidence issues and a lot of negative self-talk. When I was first introduced to GLAD I would go for a walk every morning and try to pay attention to what was going on around me rather than what was happening in my head. Could I hear the birds singing, the leaves rustling in the wind, did I smell cut grass or rain in the air, did I see the squirrels burying their nuts or the rabbits eating plants and so on. On this particular day I didn’t really want to go on the walk so I just slipped some house shoes on instead of my athletic shoes. In my head I would get credit for going on the walk but I wouldn’t actually have to inconvenience myself. As I started walking I started relaxing and enjoying my walk, very shortly after that I noticed my feet hurting and how uncomfortable I was. For the remainder of the walk it was all I could focus on. I happened to have my counseling session that afternoon and mentioned it because I was disappointed in myself for not being able to be present in my walk. I was angry with myself for putting on shoes that I knew wouldn’t be comfortable and therefore ruining my walk. How could I be so stupid, I knew better? She responded with it looks like you found your something you learned today. You learned to wear proper footwear so that you can enjoy your walk. There needs to be no guilt attached to it, in the future you’ll wear the proper footwear and be able to enjoy your walk. It seemed so easy but I had literally never thought of it that way. Could it be so easy to shut off all the anger and self-hatred by simply allowing myself to use it as a learning experience? I asked her how I could learn that when I knew the answer before I started. She reminded me that sometimes we have to learn a lesson more than once before it really sticks. She was right, so far ever since then, even though I’ve been tempted, I always elect to wear proper footwear when I’m going for a walk so that it can’t ruin my experience. Although the deeper lesson of giving myself the grace to learn is a lesson I still need practice in and to learn more than once before it really sticks. With that being said, I will offer you my things I am GLAD for today. What are you GLAD for?
Today I am grateful I woke up, I am grateful for you, and I am grateful for my children. Today I learned that I’m not good at teaching 3rd grade math. Today I achieved my writing goal for the day. Today I took delight in being outside and enjoying the fall weather.
Remember, stay positive and share positivity. Much Love
Additional Resources:
Suicide Prevention Hotline: 1-800-273-8255
https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
https://www.nationalgeographic.com/animals/2019/03/animals-winter-hibernation-turtles/#close